The other day I wrote a thank you e-mail to Bruno-Luc from Louis Garneau. I was in immediate need of different size cycling shoes and honestly the next day, they were at my doorstep. He became my hero and I was even more excited that the shoes looked so snazzy with my red and white bike because well…the shoes are a shiny, sparkly red and white. In response to my e-mail, Bruno-Luc asked if I heated up my shoes in order to make them mold to my feet. I could only laugh at this question as anyone who knows me understands that I haven’t put anything in an oven for almost 3 years let alone a pair of brand new happy shoes. My response went something like this…
I cannot lie to you. I am nervous about heating up my shoes. I lack any experience with ovens so the shoes are not in qualified hands plus I don’t own a pan. Before you judge me on my lack of pans just know that my entire life has reverted back to the 1930s as I have been writing with unsharpened pencils, my cell phone has been broken for 6 months, and currently am operating on a cash only basis due to some credit fraud. Fun times.
I will trust you if you tell me it is simple and I won’t melt my new shoes but do I really need to put them on a pan? Who uses these things called pans anyway?! How about just some tin foil?
Luc…I’m a mess
I do want to apologize to Bruno-Luc for such a drawn out response but he probably didn’t realize who he was talking with and he also probably regrets his decision to involve me in any sort of e-mail dialogue. Bruno-Luc’s response to my e-mail was that we could have a phone conversation and asked how he could reach me. Again, I had to laugh as I have no phone and no way of receiving any incoming calls. He now must have realized that I am truly a disaster.
To make matters even horribly worse, the plumbing in our apartment went bust and has completely wreaked havoc on my life deciding to spew all of my neighbors shit into my bathtub continually throughout the day. Of course, this perfectly suits my reverting to the 1930s as my toilet has also felt the effects of the plumbing problems and I am now considering the possibility of using the pan in my cupboard in order to relieve myself.
When will the madness end?