So I started writing a blog maybe 4 or 5 weeks ago – it never got finished. I really don’t remember why I didn’t finish it at the time but it’s a fair guess that Lola-Rose was something to do with the interruption.
Since giving birth to Lola-Rose on 29th July 2012 everything has been about her…I mean EVERYTHING!
I honestly never expected her to dictate my life this much, but she does and I love it.
It’s like a switch flicked inside me the day she was born and all of a sudden you don’t matter anymore – it’s all about making her happy.
Suddenly it’s ok to talk about poo’s and nappies when you’re at BBQ’s!?
Since the day The Doc and I came to terms back in February it’s always been Brett’s stance that if I decided after giving birth that motherhood was for me and triathlon had no place in that equation – well he’d support that and we’d go our separate ways. I don’t know if he expected that to happen, what I do know is every time we talked about training or plans he would say ‘If you decide to walk away I’ll support it 100% and be happy for you’.
For the first couple of weeks of little Lola’s life I couldn’t see how I could conceive of getting back into training. Not only did she demand all of my time – but even when she was sleeping I’d find myself either absolutely shattered or just wanting to be near her anyway and had no desire to head out the door training and leave her.
But some semblance of normality has slowly come back into our lives. You slowly work out what works for her and what works for you. You make a hell of a lot of mistakes and they never cease to amaze you with the lessons something so little can teach you. And after 9 weeks of her life I’m slowly starting to get back into things.
I think I was very lucky in term of the birth. I was up watching the men’s road race in the Olympics – it was about 1am and things were starting to turn pear shaped for Mark Cavendish when I first noticed some pains in my stomach that I’d not felt before. Ironically a reporter had rung a couple of days prior and mid conversation had suggested if I managed to give birth on the day of the Opening Ceremony that it’s make a great story for the Sunday Herald…at the time I just thought ‘what a twit – as if I can turn it on by demand!’.
We waited until 9am the following day as I didn’t want to ring Maree our midwife during the night…especially not a Saturday night! She confirmed what we kind of already knew that I’d started labor. By 2pm the pain had stepped up and Stephen rang her again – this time she said It was time for us to make the trip to the hospital.
Living a little way out of town it took us around 40 minutes to get to hospital, that included a stop-off at the bottle shop for Stephen to buy a bottle of Brandy…he’s not good with blood. ☺
By 7.50pm that evening little Lola-Rose was born, I refused drugs throughout the birth. I’m not against drugs during pregnancy per se, but once it all started I just saw it as a little bit of a challenge to be honest – besides Stephen had enough for the both of us he got quite a taste for the gas apparently it complimented the brandy?!
At 6 pounds and 6 ounces little Lola-Rose was anything but the large baby all the scans had predicted, but what she lacks in size she makes up for in strength. Just this morning at 9 weeks old and a touch over 10 pounds I came in the room after hanging some washing out to find her shaking a small wooden rattle friends had brought her – she’s well ahead of other baby’s born at the same time as her.
I’ve decided I shall get back into things and have another crack at the Ironman. I still feel I have unfinished business with the distance. Lola really has put things into perspective for me and if it doesn’t work out I’ll be happy to know I gave it a go and I have the rest of my life with my beautiful daughter. But something excites me about the thought of giving my best effort somewhere in the world and having little Lola cheer me over the line.
It certainly won’t be easy – but with the support I have at home I know it’s definitely ‘do-able’ I’d never even consider it if I thought it would jeopardise my time with little Lola.
Just yesterday we were down in Taupo here in New Zealand. It was the National Secondary Schools Duathlon Championships and I had some of the kids I coach racing down there. What really struck me was the disparity between the level of support the kids had. Some of the kids had ALL the gear, where others just got by with the basics. Regardless of what bikes or wheels they were riding – it was the kids with desire and work ethic that performed the best. I had two of my athletes podium in the National Champs – they’re not the kids with the best gear or most talent – but they work, achieve small goals, celebrate, and then re-set their goals.
If watching me race helps little Lola learn work ethic, determination and perseverance, then I’ll be happy. I don’t care if she’s an artist, sportsperson, homemaker or whatever else she decides on I want the world to be her Oyster not mine, as long as she is happy with her choices and knows how to work toward a goal.
Anyway, I’ve rambled enough. I’ve turned into one of ‘THOSE’ parents whose whole world revolves around their children…and I’m proud of it. Next step is to get myself back to fitness and give little Lola-Rose some memories of mummy that’ll make her proud.
All the best,